A Sacred Journey

Hello friends.
Change of plans. We liked Varanasi so much we decided to postpone our
journey to Kathmandu and stay in Benares another 4 days. We are
starting to get to know the streets and where everything is. We've
been doing alot of chilling in our guest house room just reading and
talking. Due to being a white foreigner, it is difficult to find a
quiet place to read outside where you won't be bothered by someone
selling you something, children asking for rupees, or a tour guide
pressing his services on you and then demanding pay for it. We'd leave
our rooms for meals and generally went to the market everyday and
walked around. Finally the guest house stopped treating us like
tourists because they realie we have been there a long time and have
seen all the "sight-seeing". I am defientely exctied for a change,
however.
One morning we got up at 530 and experienced the sun rising over the
Ganga river (smoggy but beautiful) while sitting in a boat. I did a
puja (lighting a candle and letting it go in the Ganga) and thought
about all those I loved and missed and about the circmstances that have
brought he here. How lucky am I to eat a wonderful fresh-cooked meal
three times a day and stay in guest houses while just outside others
cannot feed or shelter themselves. Their dignity remains only in their
day to jobs and contributing to their small communities.
Logan gave several children some toys and they were so happy. There
couldn't have been much sleep that night as the next morning, bright
and early, about 7 children were laughing and playing with some plastic
race cars from MacDonald. It's beautiful but disturbing all at once.
Made some phones calls the other day...sorry about the boring one to
the entire family...so many people and the delay made me unsure of what
to say. My apologies for a disapointing call...I walked away realizing
that I really did not feel that I connected like I wanted to. Seems
like your reality is so far and so different than mine that
communication is difficult to do without formality and distance.
I awoke at about 5 am this morning feeling sick...but a few bathroom
trips later I seem to be doing better. Don't worry or anything...I
tried to eat well today...I want to be in good shape for Kathmandu
tomorrow. Well actually, Kathmandu won't be for two days as we're
staying the night at a hotel on the border.
Varanasi has been great. Logan and I are getting along better than
before (finally settled into travelling together) and we seems to meet
all the right people.
Due to a OSHO book I've been reading (The psychology of the esoteric)
I've been focusing on energy levels/centers and different phases of
consciousnesses lately. I like lying in bed and listening to the
never-ending sounds of the Indian night. My body falls asleep but my
mind is deeply involved in these sounds. Women talking, men yelling,
children crying, cows mooing, dogs fighting, distant hums of riskhaws
and cars and the drone of crickets is the basis. It's unbelievable the
patterns and sequences that occur. It's almost like music. It's
amazing trying to be aware of everything, in every moment. Something
new is constantly occuring, but this is only noticeable if you can be
conscious. Stop running tapes in the mind and simply be. Stop being
attached and you ease the let-down. Life is about compromise, you must
be un-attached. As Logan tells me often, "sometimes you must ride the
horse in the direction he's already going". I've realized that I have
some very obssesive aspects to my behaviour. Little things (like
Logan's stuff lying around) annoy me and I feel the need to plan our
days. I've been focusing on leaving these parts of myself and falling
in love with spontenaity and compassion as well as the silence of my
mind. Wish me luck!
Much love to all those who search for the truth,
the inward seeker is the only truth seeker.

Namaste

Posted by Dominique on 10 October 2006 at 9:45:00 AM | Permalink